DEAR LORAINE….letter to myself.

Since open letters are the in thing i decided to be selfish and write one to myself. It is very rare that i look back at my life and count the blessings, thank God for his favour but above all appreciate who i am. I always thank my family and friends for their unwavering support. I truly am a better woman because of them.

Dear Loraine

Congratulations to you for taking that step to being your own boss. It has not been easy. I bet you never thought you would be here ?? Styling Musicians and being a PR Consultant as well as managing your own Company CharmingROSE.

You look so beautiful and so happy. You styled this rising and beautiful Musician Sihle Ndaba for her photoshoot. An opportunity many would struggle to get. You sourced all these beautiful and amazing clothes with no contacts and no budget. You know how to hustle sister.Sometimes i wonder if you truly understand and know how precious you are to those who love you. You work so hard and tirelessly to build this legacy that only you see and understand.

Do you remember when Dad passed away last year how hard it was for you more than all your other siblings?. You loved him and yet you did not know him. Your sense of identity was lost within the dreams that could never be. I remember how you cried yourself to sleep at night and you prayed no one would hear you. It seems like i while ago but it’s just yesterday.

Do you remember that long and dreary trip back home to Bulawayo when you had to confront your parents and share that you had decided to embark on a new journey? Girl , you were so scared. I can look back and laugh at you now.  Sometimes you just tend to be dramatic for nothing. You knew there was nothing to fear. They embraced and accepted your decision, you overcame that.

Do you also remember going to Harare with nothing but $20 in your pocket and praying to God for that opportunity to work with the Miss Zimbabwe Team so you could make a name for yourself as a Stylist. You did not get to work with them as a Stylist but you took that opportunity that they gave you.  It  did not happen as you wished it would but you soon built relationships that have opened other windows for you. At the last minute , 2 months into the Pageant , you were roped into the planning of this amazing and traditional Pageant. Do you see how God has been taking care of you and how he has favoured you in this journey?

In a year you have moved house 5 times , don’t nobody out there know what it’s like and how emotional it has been . You have worked with the amazing and talented award winning Siphokazi Mohapi, the likes of Thandy Matlaila, and Weza Solange but you still do not give yourself credit for any of your achievements. Is it so hard for you to look back and see how much you have grown and how much you have learnt in a space of a year?

When there was no money to attend events or to even call back home and let Mama and Daddy know you were okay, you were still positive God would provide and he did.  They were tough times and you were scared that people would not accept you because you did not look a certain way and that your business was a small business. One thing you have always had going for you is your confidence and personality. You still went out and presented yourself to the world . I don’t know how you did it??

You have been through the worst times most women or men cannot handle but you are still standing. I don’t see you celebrating these milestones. I know you are afraid of not living a purposeful life and that your work and your dream is all you know and live for. God has your back. Be yourself, live life to the fullest and enjoy each day as it comes. Learn to take your own advice and apply it to your own life.

It’s okay to make mistakes . Get up and try again. That little girl from Tshabalala has come a long way and i am so proud of her. You know that this is just the beginning.  I am with you all the way.