Don’t ask why? Let go

It’s a beautiful Sunday in Jo’burg. It just started to rain and there is no perfect weather than the present one to share this with you.

I grew to love a particular boy when I was a teenager and God blessed us with the gift of life and we manage to both grow into adulthood around each other. I would say he was a great friend, I thought of him as my best friend actually.

As life would have it we ended up together and dated for a short while. When the relationship ended I was broken emotionally and spiritually. I had waited for what seemed like a life time to be with this man and so when our paths crossed like many growing Christians who are still learning in their walk of faith I took this as a sign that we were meant to be together. So when the break up happened I did not receive it well. I wanted to know why? I asked God but my soul was not quenched.

I felt he did me wrong and he owed me an answer. I invested probably half of my adulthood on this relationship. The more I pursued the answers the more I was going nowhere. One day after 5 months or so I realized how consuming my hurt and anger had led me in the wrong pathway. I did not see it that way at the time. My excuse was “I needed closure”.. ki ki ki. It even sounds funny when I think back. I needed to snap out if it.

Today I was scrolling through my Facebook timeline and Paul Coelho is one of the Authors I follow. He reminded me of something that I want to share with you in case you know someone struggling with letting go. Once in a while we need to hear it too.

While reading this I remembered what my challenge was. I could not let go. I refused to walk away and accept what was. He left me with no gun held to his head or anything. It was a choice He made. He left willingly. Sometimes we excuse bad toxic relationships by stepping into the shoes of the other party and making excuses like ” maybe he couldn’t talk to me, maybe I did something to hurt him or maybe he needs time”.

The struggle of letting go of relationships, things or experiences that no longer serve us is a reality many of us learn the hard way. That can be dangerous because if life or let’s just say God blessed you with something better or that was good for you, chances are you would not see it because your heart yearns for something in the past.S something you cannot have but somehow you have convinced yourself you can have it. Learn to live in the NOW and while you seek healing from the past open your heart to new people, a new love , a new job or a new gift that God has brought into your pathway. They left because you no longer serve a purpose in their life. They like you also have a right to do what is right for them and sadly it comes with a price. Whether it is right or wrong is a conversation we can have another day. Ask yourself this, why would you need someone who no longer values you back in your life?

People do what they can with what they know and ultimately walking away or leaving you is on them and not you. The sooner you embrace that it will be easier to focus on you and what you deserve and remember you are more than entitled to go after it. Happiness is when you consistently choose yourself.

Forgive them and free yourself and let the good things knocking in your doorstep in. Happy Healing and LETTING GO!!