The One Minute Woman

Listening to Melanie Fiona’s track “Give it to me right” reminded me of the 1st Edition of #BringSexyBack experience we hosted this past Saturday. A particular conversation came to mind.

A single woman or married woman’s intimacy’s struggles are real. We laugh about the one minute man aa Missy Elliot once so honestly put it in one of her songs back in the day. One of our bold Guest Speakers Stevel Marc was honest enough to break down and really engage with us as women why even today in the 21st Century getting what we want is hard.

Firstly go online and look up Melanie Fiona’s track that i just mentioned. Let’s start from there. I promise you as a single woman i can relate to what she is talking about. So often we point to the one minute man. Today i am inspired to write about the “One Minute Girl”.

You know that first night when you are going to bae’s place or he is coming over for a date ( yep girl Lord knows you has been single for too long). That night when you know it is about to go down and somebody is going to keep the neighbours up all night. It is exciting. You are excited. You start thinking about your hair , whether to refresh that hairstyle or not and whether its Januworry or not you will make a plan or your girls will hook you up. If he is sleeping over you also start looking up some recipes online or choosing what’s for dinner or if you are generally on your own like myself you start thinking what groceries to buy. I promise you don’t nobody get excited like your girlfriends when they know you got a hot date. We are close like that as women.Your girls will line up to borrow you shoes, a clutch bag or hook you up with cash for a manicure or pedi for that eventful date.. Ladies you know what i am talking about.

I mean we will talk about your flower and whether its ready for “Polokwane” or not. We will even check if you know or remember some styles ..lol..depending on how long you have been out of the game right?? We will baby sit if we have to. We do it out of love for one of our girls who may have found her man..or so we think..

So now you are all prepped up. You got your hair done in all the right places. Your outfit is on point and if you have a mkhaba situation going on in there you got them spandex on lock down. You look good and you know you smell good. Your presentation is tight!! There is no way this man will deny you what is yours!! Men know very well that we undress them with our eyes the same way they undress us, we learnt from the best..

Now lets talk about when the moment to “Polokwane” arrives and brothers has you all excited and ready but wait!!! He only last a few seconds… Yep!!. While some of you maybe strong and assertive to walk away not many women out there are. You want to believe in your man. You want to excuse his lack of delivery and say maybe he was tired. Maybe he is not feeling well or better yet let me give him a second chance.SMH!!

As women we don’t treat ourselves with love and respect. Imagine all the money you have spent trying to do your part. The energy and time it took to get yourself ready and someone shows up only to waste your time and get you excited for nothing. Girl, please stop wasting an erection..

Like Stevel said. It is about time women started respecting an erection and in this case your own erection. Sex issues are real in relationships and a part of our #BringSexyBack experience also covers that. When will you own and appreciate your sensuality and that your needs in a relationship also matter? When will you put yourself first?. We know for a fact when a man thinks you are a bad lay as they sat it on the street he aint coming back!! PERIOD. A man doesn’t think to himself let me teach her. Let me show her how it is done or how i want it…nope..

Lalela Sisi bot everything is be nurtured and certainly not everything is to be nurtured by YOU. Know when to walk away and not for the sake of just walking away. Know WHAT you are walking away from. See it for what is and make a bold step. Now i am not just referring to sexu intimacy only but in general a patner with a mediocre attitude in your relationship.

Dont be the One Minute Girl. The girl who forgets her needs in a minute to get a man or keep a man. The girl who does not speak up and say what she wants. The girl who forgets her value and overnurtures and over compromises herself… You are loved and appreciated..act like it…